Entries Tagged 'The Femme's Guide' ↓
October 4th, 2008 — Audacia Ray, Blogs, Books, Coldplay, Movies, Recommendations, Shopping, The Femme's Guide, The Good Things List, Websites
Definitely *Not* A Good Thing (Postsecret.com)
Here are a few of my favorite things. Some are free, some are not. They were all handpicked by me (Catalina) with you in mind:
A Good New Site:
Public Disgrace by Kink.com is really on the edge, literally - their first scene is fantasy rape and it is really hot. Keep in mind it’s fantasy, people - we all know real rape and fantasy rape are very separate things and consensual fantasy rape is a very common fantasy for many women like myself, who consider themselves to be feminists.
A Good Blog:
Skid Roche is self-described as: “The online home of writer Thomas S. Roche, author of crime-noir, fantasy, horror, and erotica stories. Contains erotic fiction, horror fiction, photos, oodles of links, and articles on horror movies, crime fiction, porn, B-movies, science fiction, film noir, horror movies, vampires, firearms, civil liberties, politics, cryptozoology, the mafia and the arts. Bigfoot says hi.” It’s a little bit of everything and then some. I like it a lot.
A Good Deal:
If you really want the Liberator Wedge/Ramp combo (like the one I reviewed) but you can’t quite slip it into your budget, take a look at their new product called, The Whirl. It is a really nice substitute for a wedge. It’s less expensive, but the quality is not cheaper. Seriously. I’m a true-blue fan of Liberator products and I specifically asked to test the Whirl and review it because I was thinking about your budget.
A Good (Sexy) Costume:
I’ve never gone to a Halloween party. Never. But I hope to one day, and if you happen to be going to one this year, you might be in the market for a sexy little costume. Check here: http://www.girlfriendslingerie.com/costumesmain.html. I happened upon it when I received an email from fan who asked me to be Batgirl in a scene and use my magic powers to dominate him and sent me the link. I do really want to be Wonder Woman, though!
A Good Laugh:
Will Ferrell’s page on Funny Or Die is …funny. I love his videos on here. Mr. F. got me started on them with The Landlord and then later with The Green Team. Be sure to check those out. Seriously, it is a good laugh.
A Good (The Best) Coldplay Site:
Coldplaying.com is the place to go if you happen to be like me and know that Chris Martin’s birthday is March 2nd. Yes, it’s for people who are truly obsessed enough to want to read all the latest news and I’m a nerd. I own ColdplayLiveArchive.com, remember. Don’t waste your time. I haven’t had a chance to upload any of the shows I have, but I think I’m close to 200 shows now, I have one from Zurich on the 28th of September that is amazing. But I digress - Coldplaying.com is the authority on Coldplay. They even have their own toolbar you can download to get the latest, breaking Coldplay news! (I know, I am pathetic).
A Good How-To Guide:
On The Femmes Guide there is a How-To Guide to do just about anything you can imagine from How To Make A Sweet Sachet to how to the How To Guide To Female Ejaculation. You’ll find a little bit of everything.
A Good Book:
I’m halfway through Naked on the Internet
and I love it! I’ll write my own review of it, but this is how Amazon describes the book:
Naked on the Internet explores how women use cyberspace, personally and professionally, to learn about themselves, connect with others, and make a living. Author Audacia Ray then goes further, examining the Internet as a valuable — though often problematic — sexual space.
Ray combines her insider’s knowledge with the voices of a variety of women whose firsthand experiences include camming, chatting, and making websites; dating, hooking up, and forming friendships; sex and relationship blogging; and making porn and doing other forms of sex work. She also examines the power of sexual health and online support communities and the technology that enables physical sexual encounters.
So that’s it for this week’s list. I hope you find something that you enjoyed! ~ Catalina
September 25th, 2008 — Andreas Troeger, Blogs, Books, Ellie Lumpesse, Madison Young, Movies, Mz. Berlin, Recommendations, Stuff and Things, The Femme's Guide, Trufetish.com, Websites, Weight Loss
Click The Pic For The Secret To How I Lost Weight
So I went to the new yoga class today and it was terribly disappointing. I felt like I was in an hour long stretch class, very gentle yoga with a nap at the end. There was no shakti in the room, no energy to go with it. Just a sterile gym with a lady who knows some poses. I’m sure she’s a certified yoga instructor, but I think that if a yoga instructor can’t do downward dog with her feet flat on the floor, she probably shouldn’t be instructing. I am a yoga snob, so it seems. Back to Power Basics Vinyasa hot yoga on Saturday with the nice vibe at Yoga One. I love the challenge of it, how I have to push my body beyond where I thought I could go because my mind limited me. To overcome mental obstacles in yoga manifests in every day life all the time. On a positive note about today’s adventure out to the new gym - the facility itself is really nice and I got to run for 2 miles after the yoga class, so I do feel like I got the energy boost I needed.
I’m really into reading Andreas Troeger’s books and watching his DVDs. Take a look at TechnologyArtist.com and click on Buy DVDs. No, it won’t automatically debit your account a bajillion dollars, it will just take you to the two DVDs that I’m going to watch and review for my blog. I just need kid-free focus time to watch them, they look intense! Included in my little surprise package (Thanks!!) were Troeger’s two books. Click on Books on the left and you’ll find Anti Biography and Which Ones Are The Terrorists? WestBank.cam, which are both equally compelling, but require even more time and focus. So expect to see more about those soon, but not next week soon.
I found this article, called Nine Cold, Hard Weight Loss Truths on Divine Caroline today. I’ve been reading that site a lot lately - like any magazine, there are some things there that I just will probably never read, but today I read this and I thought I would share it with you. One of the most common email questions I get to my inbox is How did you lose all that weight? and the fact is, I did what everybody in the whole world knows how to do - I ate less and I exercised with purpose and intensity. Anyway, take a look at the cold, hard truth. It’s worth reading again.
Well, back to work. W is home from her game tonight and then I have to run across town for an errand and back and then I still need to write something for CatalinaLoves.com and my article for TruFetish.com is due tomorrow. Not to mention that I should write something current for The Femmes Guide and it would be at good manners to comment on a few of my favorite blogs! Tomorrow W stays the night with a friend and we’re expecting Ellie for a visit. She’s here for the Fetish Fair Fleamarket where she’ll be doing a demo. I will also be there, just to wander about and see what’s good. If you’re planning to go, I hope to see you there!
Oh random - a package just arrived in the mail from Madison Young with her movie, Perversions of Lesbian Lust (Volume 1). I’m pretty excited about that - on the back cover is a still from the movie and I said to Marky, “Oh, it’s her infamous ’sex mouth’ that you love.” You have to know the exact look to know what I mean, but Mz Berlin comes close in this image. Anyway, I am so hot for Madison Young I can’t stand it! I know what I’ll be watching tonight!
September 23rd, 2008 — Blogs, Bondage, Books, Fetish, Fundraising, Lochai, M, Madison Young, Movies, Ms Nikki Nefarious, Networking, Recommendations, Reviews, Stuff and Things, The Femme's Guide
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[Image from Postsecret.com
You play… you pay. That was what my Mom would say as she punished me as a child. Well, I’m paying in spades. Too much play means I’m way behind on work. Last night
M and I decided at the last minute to go out for drinks, which gave me an excuse to wear my new clothes. Before that I made a trip in to Charlotte for a separate errand. Saturday I went to
yoga with Susan. Basically, I got a blog post or two written and that was it. I have a bajillion emails that I starred in gmail to respond to when I have time. Now I have to devote time to responding or else they just fall off the page. I need to get my ass in gear and work!
Sometimes it’s a fine line between playing and working. Today, for example, I was totally playing, yet I could say it was a long day at work - we did two different sets of suspension bondage shots, a MILFtastic office pic, a sex nerd photo, and a few other product sets for upcoming reviews. So while I was technically working, I feel like I was away at play all day (plus I wasn’t at home). I did come home and review a Madison Young movie I watched recently. Is that work or play? A combination of both, really.
I am really excited to dive into the Better Sex Through Yoga 3 DVD Series that Garvey sent to me. I reviewed his book a few months ago. In his package he also sent fascinating documentaries and books that I will keep a mystery for now. They are completely unrelated to yoga.
I am re-watching Joseph Campbell’s DVDs, The Power of Myth. If you have never seen it, I highly recommend it. If you have seen it, but it’s been a while, you should re-watch it. I’ve gained so much more from watching it this time. The timing was perfect - I came home from yoga with a sense of being connected to the collective unconscious and present in the moment and watched Joseph Campbell talking about living in the moment and following your bliss. I realize it is exactly what I’ve done. I have taken The Hero’s Journey and this makes me incredibly proud. Slaying dragons. Seriously - (re)watch it.
I’m a weirdo in that I own copies of the Stanford Prison Experiment and the Obedience Experiment and I’ve watched them both with W - it helped her to understand Abu Ghraib and other crimes against humanity. She also taught her art teacher about Fernando Botero’s art exhibit of his interpretation of the Abu Ghraib images. I thought that was kind of cool, actually.
Other things worth noting before abruptly ending this post:
My friend, Tess, is on a “Cleavage of the Day” strike. Until the terms of her demands are met, there will be no boobs. Please, people - for the good of humanity, do whatever it is she asks - we need daily cleavage shots! Tess’ boobs make the day so much easier to greet.
The 6 Degrees of Catalina list is growing each day - there are about 200 people on the mailing list and people are starting to put in calls for submissions for anthologies, etc. So I think I’ll give it a shot. If you are somehow related to the sex writing, sex blogging, podcasting, sex education, BDSM, fetish, erotic art scene (including the techies that keep us together!) and would like to be added to the list, please send me an email at catalinaloves@gmail.com and put “6 Degrees” in the subject line. I’ll add you automatically.
Alternatively, if you have a request for the list, please send it to me using that same email link. There are currently a few things in the queue including calls for submission for anthologies that sex bloggers might be interested in. It would be nice to see variety in the list - someone must need something? No?
Roxy Harte wrote a really interesting post on the Femmes Guide called “How-To Guide For Female Ejaculation” that is worth reading for all of you who are seeking out the squirting experience. Obviously, I thought it was interesting and worth mentioning.
Welcome Home to Lochai, Janice, and the Kitties! I am certain that this weekend you will feel your new CommUNITY welcome you with warm arms.
A final plea - please buy a day on the NYC Sex Bloggers 2009 Calendar. You don’t have to be a sex blogger and you don’t have to have a product to sell. You could send a special message to a special someone, you could put your anniversary there, you could write a message of peace, love, and hope to the world. Keep in mind that you are paying $10 for the day, but that day shows for 30 days! Please, I beg of you - I need the Cleavage of the Day to survive.
September 20th, 2008 — BestSexBloggers.com, Blogs, Bondage, Fetish, January Seraph, Lochai, Mz. Berlin, Photos, Recommendations, Satine Phoenix, The Femme's Guide, The Week In Kink
Sex Blog Picks For The Week! Send your best/favorite post to me at CatalinaLoves@gmail.com and I will take a look at it. If it passes the Catalina loves… test, then I’ll use it in The Week In Kink, which is posted at TheWeekInKink.com and cross-posted all over teh internets. I’m considering posting it on Sunday. There is something extra naughty about posting the kinkiest stuff I can find on Sunday.
::psst… for more hot sex blog links go to Sugasm.com::
September 12th, 2008 — Audacia Ray, BestSexBloggers.com, Blogs, Bondage, Fetish, Fundraising, Hogtied, Live Girl Review, Lochai, Mz. Berlin, Recommendations, Satine Phoenix, The Femme's Guide, Websites
http://satinesblog.com
Sex Blog Picks For The Week! I’ve been trying to decide how to do The Week in Kink now that normally the people I would feature are almost all on BestSexBloggers.com. One thing I want to try is a call for submissions. Send your best/favorite post to me at CatalinaLoves@gmail.com and I will take a look at it. If it passes the Catalina loves… test, then I’ll use it in The Week In Kink, which is posted at TheWeekInKink.com and cross-posted all over teh internets.
::psst… for more hot sex blog links go to Sugasm.com::
August 23rd, 2008 — Blogs, Stuff and Things, The Femme's Guide, Weight Loss
Image from Postsecret.com
This post about my new identity as an ex-fat femme and the implications of being a former fat femme appears originally at The Femmes Guide, where I am a contributing writer. It fits in nicely here, so I thought I’d share it with you, also.
In a recent discussion amongst ourselves we came to the conclusion that we need more diversity in our group of contributors. I believe it was stated something along the lines of us all being white, with advanced educations, and with the exception of one (me) identified as fat femmes. I still fit though. I’m an ex-fat femme.
Not long ago I came out, not as a queer femme, but as an ex-fat queer femme. I started talking about this recently with friends, how life has changed for me, especially as a femme, being thin. I’ve been informed that the rules have changed and I now have to learn how to navigate my way through society as a thin woman, which means (and my friend really did say this) I’m not supposed to use the word fat anymore. Really? Is that true? Is it like the “N Word”? Maybe it’s the equivalent of calling myself queer, but not wanting someone else to call me a queer? I don’t know.
Let me give you some background. In February of 2007 I went to the doctor. I had a baby at home with a midwife in 2005. I hadn’t seen my weight since 2005. I knew I was fat, but I didn’t expect them to say, “270 lbs. today”. I immediately began to cry and cried through my entire initial consultation with a physician I had never met. She must have thought I was nuts. Well, kind of. I was there for refills on my antidepressants.
I cried and cried and cried and came home and cried some more. 2 7 0. Two hundred and seventy pounds. I felt sexy. I still felt like other people found me to be sexy. My delicious husband never let on that he didn’t enjoy my body or find me attractive. Our former girlfriend was a yummy size 18 and never once did I find her anything but perfect in her skin. Yet the numbers resonated in my head. Of course I knew I was fat. I could only buy clothes at Lane Bryant or go with the limited selection of “plus-sized woman” options in a mainstream department store that were sinfully ugly. I remember feeling like it was a punishment for being fat - either pay exorbitant prices at Lane Bryant or wear the ugly fat lady clothes.
Something fundamental changed that day, and I can’t tell you what it was. It wasn’t about being healthy. I know, it should be. It was something else that I hope to be able to pinpoint by writing about this topic. I strictly couldn’t process that I was 30 lbs. shy of 300 lbs. and I am only 5′ 4″.
Fast forward to today - it is August, 2007. I weigh 140 lbs. I’m a size six. Life is very different and apparently the rules of engagement have changed. I’m going to try to figure them out, and hopefully you’ll help me by just giving me a place to write about it here. I want to, for example, write about how uncomfortable it makes other people that I’ve lost weight and they haven’t, or how people now worry I’m anorexic because I am so self-disciplined.
This post would go on forever and a day if I were to talk about each of those 130 lbs. that I’ve lost and all the work that went into each one of them - physical and emotional. Everybody wants to know the secret. There was a rumor where I used to work that I had gastric bypass surgery (how else could she have lost all that weight?). I didn’t. I would have, but the process seemed so complex and complicated.
Here’s what I did, in a nutshell: I changed the way I thought about the world. I changed the way I thought about myself. I changed virtually every element of who I am except for the core values I hold and my red hair and freckles. I journaled every day. I found ways to enjoy exercise (a totally unique concept to me). I did it the good, old-fashioned way and threw in a bunch of yoga, visualization techniques, meditation and neuro-linguistic programming. I’m far from finished. I don’t just mean the last 20 lbs. I want to lose. I mean in the way I see myself now and how that is different from how I thought it would be.
So what do you think? Is fat a naughty word we ought not say unless we ourselves identify as fat? Does it count that some days I feel fat? Can I still support the National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance or is it patronizing? [On a side note: I do think it's funny that in their own Cafe Press store their largest size is XL]. Does being thin make me more feminine than when I was fat? I feel more femme than ever, to be honest. Is my friend right? Am I limited to using {BBW, volumptuous, curvy, overweight, larger, bigger, and plus-sized} when all I want to say is fat?
